With three friends pregnant right now, I thought the timing of this comic was kind of funny. Heehee.

When I was a child I had a Portuguese nanny who was in the process of learning English. Because I continually tagged along with my sister who is seven years older than me, I thought I was a little Miss-Know-It-All (yes, even then). So my nanny – we called her Jo – encouraged me to correct her when she didn’t say something correctly in English. And I’ve been doing it to everyone – to the chagrin of my mom and Trinity – ever since.

I’ve been trying to restrain my instinct to correct others loudly, though. But Sunday was a particularly difficult day.

During a portion of our Sunday service, my pastor’s wife was talking and she said “….in unisence.” My head snapped around and my eyebrows did an instant furrow. It wasn’t the first time she’d said it, and I believe she means “in unison” or “in a sense of unity.” Either way – it’s not a word!

Just a few minutes later, a lady, God bless her, was giving a testimony. She was describing a bad night with some cough medicine and said she was “halucitatin.” Augggh! I know she meant she was hallucinating, but still!

Then, she just a few breaths later, she said she had an “intervision.” Oh. My. God. I’m not even sure what she meant to say with that one.

Later, we were guests at another church for a special service. The preacher, after several worship songs and speakers, was your old-school type that blaxploitation films love to feature — he preached in a sing-song manner, had a weird hiccup going on that hurt Trinity’s ears, but for the most part, he was … an interesting experience.

“…immortalize and chroniclize…”

What?!! This guy is from Berkeley too! There is not such word as chroniclize. No. No. NO.

Maybe I was just halucitatin. But it’s still NOT A WORD.