On turning 10 and 30

Round numbers seem to be my preoccupation lately — in April, this online real estate I call darleeneisms (and once called darleeneisms.com, once called Random Thoughts, once called My Diamond In The Sky — really!) turns 10, and in May, I turn 30. I have mixed feelings about both these milestones, and I wonder if I’m articulate enough to really get it all out there in a way that won’t sound all incoherent and rambling.

There are countless numbers of blogs that have celebrated blogiversaries, some in huge, public, community-building events, like Franklin Avenue’s upcoming race (btw, I did notice the redesign — finally!). I hate to admit it, but oh well — my blog does not have the dependable community of fans that Franklin Avenue has, but you know what? I’m OK with that. I still kind of freak out when I hear people are reading this here thing; I’m used to writing my heart out in obscurity. Whatever.

Is it weird that I’m turning 30 and my blog is turning 10 in the same year? I don’t think so. When I was 19, I was recovering from a life blow but also learning to be my own person — quickly. What better way learn from yourself than to write everything down and read back on it later? Keeping a running log of my 20s has been interesting — including being recognized at FPAC‘s information booth one year — but I feel like I know myself well now. Well, I better — I’m going to be 30!

What does being 10 in the blogosphere mean? LOL. Good question. It probably means I have way too much time on my hands and I hog the laptop at home way too much. It puts me in the ranks of longtime personal sites and blogs like Kottke, Dooce and Maganda.org — longevity is probably the only thing I share with those well-designed, well-read and probably financially solvent sites. Are there any other sites I’ve missed that are 10 years or older? I don’t know; I mention those three because they’ve always been my role models. I haven’t had any epiphanies, yet, but I’ll let you know when one hits me.

And yes, I do have to acknowledge my anonymous years. I blogged, let’s see, 2 1/2 years under a pseudonym on a blog never connected to this one. Those years included my time as a cops reporter at the Glendale News-Press, my whirlwind wedding at Pt. Fermin, and my obsessive job search. Eventually, I’ll move some of those posts here, and I’m thinking I may do that as the calendar inches toward April 21. As for my previous promise to move my Really Old Archives to WordPress, I’m thinking…nah. I kind of like having them separated that way.

To be quite honest, as you can easily see, I’ve thought a lot more about my 10-year blogiversary than my 30th birthday. I guess its kind of because 10 years blogging continuously is more of an accomplishment than turning 30, which is simply automatic, like breathing. Not to say I don’t celebrate my every breath — I do!

The specter of my birthday has been bothering me, but not for the usual reasons. Getting older doesn’t bother me; so far, I’ve found that life gets better with every year. Plus, I still feel like a kid, seeing as how I squeal when I see animals live and in person and take pictures like a tourist wherever I go. Hey, life is short, live it up, right? No, more than anything, the specter of how you’re supposed to celebrate your third decade bothers me. I think everyone I’ve ever known has either gone to Vegas, done a night on the town, thrown a big bash, gone on a binger, blah, blah, blah. BORING. Been there, done that. Can you give me another cliche? Even a surprise party would be a cliche (not that anyone would plan such a thing for me, I’m the planner in my circle of friends, so I knew that possibility was out of the question a long time ago). Not only all that, my friends are a bunch of flakes. Seriously. Well, to be fair, its probably just life that makes people flaky — you know, people have jobs, babies, vacations to get to around Memorial Day, the time of year my birthday falls on, but still. The thought that people who were supposed to be my loved ones and friends making more excuses to avoid yet another of my efforts to hang out with said loved ones and friends was giving me a bad taste in my mouth.

Anyway, I do have an idea brewing on how to celebrate both milestones, but I have to see if it is feasible first. Best thing about my idea is, I don’t need anyone I already know to show up. So stay tuned if you want to celebrate with me….