Coming soon to a hotel near me

I was surfing around on my break, perusing ETC ads on Craigslist – not really looking for anything, just looking to see what’s going on. Well, one ad screaming “Agoura Hills” at me caught my eye.

Since I live there now, I tend to be interested. So I checked it out.

Apparently, the Renaissance Agoura Hills Hotel wants to staff its driveways with Valet Girls, which according to their all-Flash website, is:

Our Valet parking team is comprised of stunning women that are models, singers, actors & dancers. We don’t just park cars, we provide entertainment.

All the beautiful ladies are professionally trained in providing the highest level of guest service and safety. Clients may request from a variety of uniforms such as: Chic & Elegant (all black attire), Tank tops, Capri pants, camisoles, mini skirts, bikinis and lingerie. Clients may customize a uniform for their event. No men. No red vests… just a team of gracious, sexy and skilled women.

Oh! That’s not all. Check out the ad itself:

*** Must be Reliable and Hardworking ***
Full and part time positions. Shifts are: 7:00 a.m. – 3:00 p.m., 3:00 p.m. – 11:00 p.m. and 11:00 p.m. – 7:00 a.m.
And we are NOW CASTING for dedicated and hardworking females for this trendy upscale hotel.
Job is parking cars and for hotel guests who self park, offering them a HUGE warm welcome and escorting them to the hotel’s front desk. Making all guests feel like they are at home. Parking cars is only 50% of the job. The other 50% is being friendly, walking guests to the front desk, making them feel at home, talking with them while they’re walking into the hotel..making their arrival experience out of this world. *** WE PAY $2+ MORE PER HOUR THAN MOST VALET COMPANIES *** The job will definitely be fun. The rate of pay with most all valet companies is $6.75 per hour plus tips. Because many guests self park at this hotel and tips won’t be as much as one would sometimes expect, the rate of pay is $10.00 per hour with no deductions… so if you work an 8 hour shift, you can expect to earn $100.00. Your job will be as a valet attendant but moreover as a “service ambassador.” What the heck is that you may ask?! Someone who stands outside the hotel at the valet area, greets guests as they walk towards the front door of the hotel, talks with them, tells them a little about the hotel, the restaurant, the indoor heated pool, etc. and makes their arrival experience warm and welcoming. Your job is to WOW each guest BEFORE they step foot in the hotel lobby. Check out: ***You must live in the area***
**Cast Member MUST HAVES**
– MUST Drive a Stick Shift
– MUST Have a GREAT Personality
– MUST Be Able to and Enjoy RUNNING
– MUST Speak and Write English
– MUST Be a Team Player
– MUST Have a Clean Driving Record
– MUST Have Your Own Transportation
MUST be willing to stand on your feet 6-8 hours per shift MUST be a team player. The valet team is made up of only 8 people and everyone must work well as a team.

Hospitality, Customer Service, Valet, Restaurant experience a PLUS++

Position Pays $10 an hour + pooled tips

To Apply please respond to:

With the following information:
Contact Numbers
Resume (if available)
1 or 2 jpeg photos (NO files larger than 100KB please)

I love it how they say they’re “casting.” So basically, most of this job is acting? I also love it how they’re looking for the girls to speak English. If they don’t speak English, they might be more appealing to the dirty, old men the Renaissance is apparently catering to.